# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
