did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
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