Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
he's single and there are thong briefs.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
