we have officially lost it.
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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