I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
home. puking in laundry basket.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Randomize
