One girl and one boy is just not enough.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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