people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
You were trust falling into bushes
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Randomize
