All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
