I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
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