what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Randomize