i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
