you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
