Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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