the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
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Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
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Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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