i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Someone came in the potted fern
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
