I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
