Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Randomize