So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
