At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Come back. Shots need mouths.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
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