Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Randomize