yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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