I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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