she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
