I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
