my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what is it with giant penises always finding me
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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