dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
