just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Randomize