He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
