he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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