**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
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