you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize