I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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