he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize
