Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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