her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
