dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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