week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
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