what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
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