Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Randomize
