haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I just sucked dick on a ferry
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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