All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
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