The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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