So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
