yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
