Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
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