I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
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