your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize