She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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