Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
