what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Randomize
