Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Who died my cat blue again?
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Randomize
