I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
